In 1987, when I was just 37 years old, I underwent a huge change in my life. The change was physical, emotional and spiritual. At the time most people who knew me thought I had gone mad……but in fact, I had gone sane.
I was to learn that when we experience a major transformation, life doesn’t change overnight.
Rather, transformation heralds the beginning of a long journey of many mini awakenings….lots of light bulbs flashing on, illuminating areas which prior to the change had been at best muddled and confused.
I learned that transformation doesn’t mean that we will never make mistakes again…..far from it.
I learned that when I make mistakes, I am able to see them in a different light, to understand their source and have the courage to confront whatever it is head on and work through it.
One of the first lessons I had to learn back in 1987 was the lesson of letting go.
Letting go of so much of the stuff in life that had burdened and held me back. Stuff that I had become overly attached to…..Stuff that owned me, rather than me owning it!
Like everything, this is an ongoing process…..it’s not something I suddenly got, and then never had to deal with it again….
Many times over since 1987, I have found myself becoming attached to the animate and inanimate stuff of life, only realising what a hold it had on me when I was able to let it go…..
The Painted Table was such an object.
When I moved to London eight years ago from The Magical Town of Crickadoon in Wales, I brought the table with me…..and began to use it as a painting table in my small London flat.
About two years ago, it became apparent that it didn’t work anymore….it was heavy and wasn’t practical in my new space…..but I had become attached to it, especially given that it was covered with paint markings.
Then I bit the bullet and gave it to the man who is caretaker of the flats I live in……he needed a table.
With the giving of the table to someone who needed it, I felt an instant sense of lightness and release…..
I replaced the Painted Table, which will always live in my heart, with a very practical, larger, light weight, fold up table and it works beautifully – and also doubles as a superb dining table when friends visit:)